perusing the social network
he is the melancholic drunk in a sleazy bar
whiskey breath nuances
comments unheard, he embraces the familiar
pictures of the past, the former
no moving on, he’s stuck to the chair
sending mixed greetings up in the air
he’s lost the art of forward thinking
as the faces of the past slowly return provoking memories to indulge
hoping one will press his slouching shoulder and say
“man you’ve had enough”

“you’ve had enough of this lie, mischief and crave”
craving the one person he viciously pushed away
seriously you’ve had enough
his stale breath, on the same chair
his fingers at work, gaining attention from those far and near
pours another, another to help linger
returns no wiser, no lighter
the same tension
the one he lost, insulted…the usual repertoire
his own insecurities aimed and fired
he closes his eyes and sips and smiles

man you’ve had enough, no wait
his curious eyes
his fingers tap and tap, tap, tap
there’s someone he once knew
sweet and kind
she’ll grab his shoulder and proclaim “it’s alright”
she’ll provide the strength, give the ego a rise
the attention, the praise

he sips some more and smiles awhile
lapping the thought a moment

enough of the lies

Profile: Zara Cassidy-Coss

nausea overwhelms me as i sit on the step
cigarette burning to the butt and i am anxious
they won’t turn up
that strange, eerie attachment to the phone
which i grip so tightly in my hand
it won’t ring
the smoke blurs my vision, my reflection
distorted in the window facing me across the garden
today i’ll be reclusive i announce
as i light up another, the stick of ill health
which hinders my body in every stage of battle
and my mind, too distracted and far away
i fear the self indulgence, creeping up behind me
clever, clever boy
charming too
knows how to make me fall hopelessly, content as i am
to revisit, revise, rewind
allows me to exaggerate images and conversations
adventures, discoveries, adolescence
mocking teenage rebellion, teenage revival
stare at the clock over my shoulder
uncertain as to why i am so concerned
so enthralled by two hands
two hands in my own
too self obsessed to scream i’m alone?
then i laugh at absurdity, shimmering
self indulgence sits to my immediate left
his hand rests on my knee, then thigh
and now i’m excited, heartbeat races round the track
in front of us both, how we love to pretend
to fictionalise and invent
scenes, lets cause a scene, awaken the neighbourhood
let them scream in ecstasy and fear
he removes his hand, suddenly i’m bored
part company before we begin to grate and mistake
lights my cigarette for me and departs
they won’t turn up

Profile: Zara Cassidy-Coss